Time flies. It is another year and another of my birthday. Fortunately, at least years after years, I have seen some changes in me. That means I am not getting old and getting worse or stupider.

The past year was pretty rough. It was rough with a lot of challenges. I don’t call them problems because the word problem make my mind clouded but challenge is something I have to get through with determination and it will bring joys when I overcome it.

Storms after storms come and go. Storms leave wreckages behind. They might pass across our life and take all what we own, but they cannot take our spirit. What we have lost, we can build it up again. We can make it stronger and better.

2005 was all about confusions under all the unexpected situations that emerged simultaneously. Some situations I could control but some were beyond my power. Vulnerable as it was, I allowed myself plunge into troubles without thinking and self-control. The worst thing was I was over-reacted to some situations.

However, 2005 was the year that I did realize a lot of things about myself because I became closer to my spirituality. It was the year that I started to do something I always wanted to do that was to volunteer with the New York Cares.

Also, it was the first year that I really lived in New York City after my two years long-distance relationship was totally over in Fall of 2004.

There are always people come and go in my life. From a very small group of people I knew in 2004, it turned out in 2005 I had made a lot of great friends but I had left some of my old friends as well. Sometimes, some people just come into our life unexpectedly and it turns out to be very beautiful. Sometimes some people walk out of our life and we just have to let them go.

My first New Year celebration in New York is the best time I have ever had. We have a house party and then go out dancing.

Then two days later, it comes to my birthday. My number is moving up another year. I have volunteered for the Meals on Wheels for the past 6 months. I have met a lot of elderly and lately I feel like I am going to reach that point one day. Of course, I will be a happy old guy. However, it just makes me pause and questions about myself. How many years will I have to enjoy my youth? How many days will I have to see this world?

Therefore, with all miseries I have had from last year either from my own creation or other’s, this year I make up my mind to enjoy my life to the fullest. The time is running out fast. There are no reasons to be unhappy and worried too much.

Growing is the process of life. I will not let any years go by and any challenges pass by without cultivating the virtue of them.

There are always some beauties in any wreckage. There are beautiful flowers hiding in the dirty mud. There are millions of stars glowing in the darkest sky. There are opportunities in crises.

It depends on how we look at it.

My first 30 has gone. Now I am feeling even more youthful and energetic. I heard someone said life starts at 30.

But age is an illusion anyway; the way we perceive our life is ageless.

Tae Athikomvittaya